Fourth of July, I get it. Memorial Day, I get that also. Thanksgiving – I’m on it like white on rice. But Labor Day, I just find it’s trying too hard to be a holiday. Which is the irony since Labor Day is about celebrating social and economic labor yet…I find it hard work!
It’s like Labor Day never really got its groove on. It was more about plopping itself as a ‘defunct holiday’ that everyone felt obligated to follow through but it doesn’t really have a great memory associated with it (unlike the other holidays, when I could ramble on forever about “that time when…”). It’s just a bit of a stick in the mud holiday and I think it needs rebranding. It never really got itself off the ground and it’s about time it was given an extreme makeover. So on behalf of San Francisco, we're going to figure it out in this article!
It needs to gain its own stance, have its own real theme and stand out from the other holiday competitors. Something like tax free in all Walgreens, family only (no friends allowed) parties in Mission/Richmond/Sunset and just by the liqor store at Coit Tower, a massive parade down Lyon Street, everyone needs to wear blue (as in blue collar worker celebration) from Ambiance or something that gives it that extra va va voom with extra bells and whistles on. A day that you go ‘Heck yes, Labor Day 2012 SF was da bomb!’
At the moment it’s grey – I see it as grey meets beige = insipid and a bit spineless. It’s a bit of a silly holiday because we just copy everything we ate and did over Memorial Day Weekend and Independence Day but just with a bit more know-how. I mean, the only reason Labor Day works is that if you got, say, a new BBQ for Memorial Day, it’ll take you till Fourth July to get it going correctly and by Labor Day, you’re knocking out burgers faster than a cow can moo.
So maybe Labor Day does have its uses – it's good to validate that you now nailed the whole sequence of the prior two holidays and are on a party planning roll. You know exactly how many people to cater for (including the stragglers who have to plough their way from Potrero Hill), what time to fire up the grill (down to the second), still got left over plastic forks & knives along with some straggling paper plates but always, I mean always, a ton of napkins. Which brings me right back to the best place to stock up all year along (drumroll): Smart & Final
Which then means Labor Day is the closing out ceremony of summer holidays! You get to use all the stuff you over-purchased during the past few months, have nailed down the food & booze quantities and now using up extra left-over stock to really close out the season. It’s a bit like a garage sale or spring clean type of holiday. Ah, I get it now.
So actually, coming back full circle, it’s not really laborious since you have just taken the summer season by storm and made the results over this one day incredibly easy. Which now brings me to renaming Labor Day to Labor’less Day, because you’re getting gold stars for party-hosting time and cost efficiently.
And there we have it – Labor’less Day is now officially open. Hotdog please from the chef in the blue shirt! And now check out local events just in case you are sick of your own garden and just can't face Delores Park nudist sun worshippers (unless it's Easter, of which we all know no other city on the planet does a Hunky Jesus Competition like us NoCal kids):






