YOU ASKED: My husband is away all the time and we want to stay connected. I'm toying with the idea of phone sex but I want to come across as sexy, not silly. Any thoughts?
GALTime.com Love and Sex expert Dr Jane Greer has a lot to say on this topic! She says, "Phone sex is a great way to stay sexually connected even when you're physically apart." OK, that sounds good in theory, but often people end up feeling like they're 'acting', playing a role and it's not always easy. (We're not all Vera Farmiga acting out the hot, sexy scene with dreamboat George Clooney in Up in the Air!)
"The key is to talk about what you like, what feels good, and what turns you on so that your words and tone of voice excite your partner," says Dr. Greer. Just like a strip tease in person... a phone tease works the same way. Let him know what you are wearing and then turn up the heat by taking it off a little at a time (or at least making him think you are!) Dr Greer says the key is to DESCRIBE in detail everything you are thinking and then doing. You have to paint a picture just like one of those steamy romance novels in the chick-lit section of the bookstore. C'mon, you know you've opened one from time to time! How descriptive should you be? Dr. Greer says the hotter the better such as, "I am now touching my breasts" or "I'm getting so hot just thinking of you." You are not a 900 line operator, but it's OK to act like one while you are helping your partner visualize everything. You already have an intimate history, so draw upon those images and memories to help paint the picture.
Don't forget to turn it around: This is a two-person party so get him involved. Ask him what he is wearing, thinking, doing --OR tell him what you want him to do! "Be creative, playful and you can also let your fantasies come into play to really spice things up". This is an opportunity to say or even try things you may not think about while you're together and have to get to sleep for that early meeting or are squeezing in sex while the kids are taking a nap. Let your inhibitions go! Phone sex is especially great for when you're apart due to vacation or work schedules...and it's less appropriate in the middle of your day at work. Other than that, Dr. Greer says bring out your wild child and have fun!
How do you steam things up while you and your partner are apart? Plus, do you think phone sex is hot or is it a 'no way' in your book? We want to hear from you!
