Question: My husband nearly never wants to have sex with me. He says he feels that I'm not committed to our marriage of 14 years. Any advice?
Answer: It sounds like your husband is upset with you and doesn't feel you are taking the marriage seriously and as a result has withdrawn sexually from you.
The question is whether he is looking to punish you by rejecting you or if he is looking to protect himself from being hurt by you if he connects intimately with you.
You need to have a conversation and ask him why he feels the way he does and most importantly ask what have you done that has made him feel this way. (Have you done anything that you know of? Be honest!)
Then ask him what it would take for him to believe that you are committed to your marriage, meaning, what behaviors he is looking for you to show him that would make him trust you and move closer to you again.
Once you know that, you can offer to work on making those changes to help him trust you more while asking him if he would also step up to the plate and rekindle your sexual life together.
Hopefully when he sees you making shifts to connect with him he'll also be willing to do so as well.
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