One of the questions I get asked a lot as a sex therapist is - How many times a week is it normal to be having sex to have a normal sex life? The most important thing that I tell everyone is that it's personal, meaning that it's about YOUR level of desire and how often you want to be having sex coupled with how often your partner wants to be having sex.
If both of you are OK with having sex once a week or twice a week or twice a month, even-- great! As long as neither one of you is feeling deprived or feels you're missing out on having the sexual intimacy, your sex life is up and running and working for the two of you.
It's only when one person wants sex more than the other that some balancing and compromising really becomes important because then the person who is not having as much sex as he/she would like starts to feel, "Hey, something's wrong with my sex life, this isn't normal and this isn't the way it's supposed to be."
What should you do? Start with what you're in the mood for and average it out with what's going to be comfortable and work for the two of you given the demands in your life and the level of energy that you have to spend.
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