By Holly Lefevre, Author of The Everything Bridesmaid Book
I was a wedding planner in Los Angeles for years. I loved it. I quickly caught on to the do's and don't of selecting my clients. I can honestly say that after all the years spent walking people down the aisle, I worked with some amazing couples and families (really, I am not lying!)
I thoroughly enjoyed planning every detail of the wedding. But there was something I had no control over-- who the bride asked to be in the wedding party.
I could go on and on about stories - silly, ridiculous, just the stuff that comes along when you involve families, money, and emotions... but today, let’s address “The fine art of bridesmaiding.” How a woman behaves as a bridesmaid can make or break a friendship. Here are some pointers.
7 Tips for Being A Better Bridesmaid
1. Be the “yes” gal. This is not your wedding. This is her day. Be agreeable. Nothing ever good has come from a disagreeable bridesmaid.
2. Leave your negativity at the door. Support and accept her decisions, even if you would not make the same ones. Whether she wants blue roses in her bridal bouquet... or if she has her heart set on serving pigs in a blanket as a main course at the reception, it's her choice.
3. Be a part of the party. As a bridesmaid, it is your duty to participate in all wedding activities, even if you despise the bouquet toss, get out there. When it is time for the toast, be present and ready to smile and click your glass.
4. Stick with her style. This is not the time to “force” or impose your style and ideas upon your friend, the bride. This is her day. Plan a bridal shower and a bachelorette party that reflect her taste and style.
Related: Bridesmaid Dress Trends
5. Be a true friend. This is about more than doing your bridesmaid duties. The bride asked you to participate because you are friends and she trusts you. Don’t let her down now. Listen when she needs to vent or brainstorm, and when you see it is all too much, make her take a break. Steal her away for a cup of coffee - no wedding talk allowed.
6. Behave. You do not want to be the talk of the wedding… the day after. That means no sneaking off with a groomsmen, getting into a disagreement with her sister-in-law or passing out in the hall. Not a good idea… for obvious reasons.
7. Be a voice of reason. Stay calm. Even in the most stressful moments, keep your head about you. Calm is contagious.
With these simple bits of wisdom, being a bridesmaid can be fun, and truly define your relationship for the rest of your lives. Most of all, it is important to remember to take the task seriously and remember you are doing this for your friend, the bride.
More from GalTime:
- How to Attend a Wedding on a Budget
- "Grown-Up" Friendship Bracelets
- Wedding Trends: NOT Following the Trends
- How to Fight Fair with Your Best Friend
About the Author
Holly Lefevre loves all things weddings. After a career in fashion design, and many, many walks of the aisle as a bridesmaid, Holly made a walk down the aisle herself, and then turned to wedding planning as a career. As a wedding expert, she has served as editor for a local bridal magazine, spoke at wedding seminars, and appeared on national television. She has inspired couples to marry with style and grace and a pop of personality that is all their own. She is the author of 7 books, including The Everything Wedding Checklist Book and most recently The Everything Vegan Book. She shares her creative and wedding whims at 504main.com.