My husband and I are in an interesting predicament.
It started as a running joke but has slowly developed into a full blown theory on a friend’s cheating wife. The thing is, we’re not really sure she’s actually cheating. A while back, while out with a group of other couples, we noticed “Jane” flirting with a mutual friend “John” like a third grader. They were throwing punches back and forth and giggling like little kids. Meanwhile, “Jane’s” hubby looked on from another room.
Obnoxious, yes. Deal breaker? Probably not. But that one incident was enough to keep us glued to her every move -- and the weeks of flirty behavior that followed. Every time we were out together it was something else. She sits next to him when we go out to dinner. She posts questionable song lyrics as her Facebook status (you know the kind of songs that elude to “wanting to be bad” and statements like “If loving you is wrong I don’t want to be right.”) Then comes the real kicker; she’s no longer wearing her wedding ring. Both she and her hubby say it’s because the metal irritates her skin. Riiiight.
I’m not going to lie; watching this bad behavior unfold has been quite entertaining. We’re always wondering what she’ll do next and how long it will take her unsuspecting husband to catch on, if he hasn’t already. But after a while we started to wonder if we should step in. The constant flirting game has gone from intriguing to totally stressful. What do other people do in these situations?
ABC’s hidden camera special What Would You Do has touched on this dilemma several times. There was the scenario where a guy is out to dinner and sees his best friend’s fiance getting cozy with another man. He tells his buddy right away, but warns him to proceed with caution in case he wants to try and save the relationship once the dust has settled. In another WWYD scenario, a woman sees her best friend’s husband at dinner with a mystery lady. She decides to keep quiet. Her explanation is that her best friend is pregnant and she didn’t want to crush her with the news if she wasn’t absolutely certain the husband was being unfaithful.
It’s a tricky topic and puts the whistleblower in an even trickier situation. Do you take on the heavy burden of keeping your knowledge secret? If not, when and how do you break the news? And what happens if you’re wrong? It’s the type of scenario that can end friendships and, even worse, break up a marriage.
So what would you do? Have you ever had to expose a cheater to a friend? How did it all turn out?