Okay, so maybe that headline is hyperbolic. Unless you’re one of those sickos who gets off on hurting people, no one is really thrilled about those soul crushing break ups. You know the kind where you feel the nausea gauge rising the moment one of you begins a statement with, “So I think you and I should….”
Yeah, you know.
And that’s just the beginning, right? Your family and friends, whether they’re being supportive or just nosy, all want the scoop. Scoop you’re not entirely certain you’re ready to share. And what’s worse, social media has become the Paul Revere of the twenty-first century. The second you change that status update to “single”, Facebook jumps on its little horse and starts riding across the internet screaming, “Marcus is single! Marcus is single! Marcus is single!” to your two thousand Facebook friends…..fifteen of which I actually know.
Not at all awkward.
Ah, but there truly is a silver lining to break ups if you dig deep. Very deep. Waaay deep. Like, super, super deep. The upside is that in all likelihood, the right decision has been made. Whether you were the instigator of the break up or not, someone was mature enough to take a broad look at that situation and realized that it wasn’t optimal for either of you.
By euthanizing that relationship you’ve not only saved yourself from potential long-term emotional disaster, you’ve created an opportunity for yourself. This is a fresh start. As awful as it is to look into that mirror at the puffy remnants of an hour of crying, there’s a dark cloud that’s been lifted. Because let’s face it, you knew things weren’t right before that break up didn’t you? Well guess what? Problem solved!
Now you’ve got the chance to turn your attention to family and friends. Here’s your opportunity to inhale life from a whole new perspective. From that of the single, happy, independent, grounded woman. And THAT women, to us guys, is ridiculously hot.
So when you show up at parties and events you own that room. You own the all the potential in that room. Because whether it’s a new job, new place to live, or a brand new love interest, the fact that you’ve only got to answer to yourself in each new situation makes those choices completely your own. How sweet is that? And from a completely hedonistic point of view, if you’re so inclined, you’re free to indulge your inner Samantha Jones. Don’t lie….you’ve thought about it.
I won’t pretend like each break up is like winning the lottery, just merely pointing out that especially during the holiday season, millions of people are going through or are contemplating whether now is the right time to end their current relationship. Just do it. As a guy I’d rather just have the band aid ripped off….particularly before I buy you gifts.
There’s no “right” time to do it. So you may as well get it over with. And as adults, we’ve all been through this. It’s not easy, but you know you always bounce back. So let’s get this thing over with so you can really enjoy this break up and embrace it like the awesome thing it’ll turn out to be!
Follow me on twitter: @smfmarcus
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