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Fifty Shades of San Francisco | Love & Sex

Fifty Shades of San Francisco
Fifty Shades of San Francisco

On October 27, San Francisco will be tipped upside down and sideways, receive a bit of a jolt and a guaranteed smile on their face with an almighty ‘ohhhhhh’.

“Why, is there’s a new fro-yo store opening up on Upper Haight” you cry?! Nope, not even remotely close. It’s the Good Vibrations Sex Summit! This is what they have to say about it:

Pioneering adult retailer Good Vibrations has gathered the brightest minds to explore our sexual state of the union at the Sex Summit on October 27th in San Francisco. Featuring an all-star line-up of authors, journalists, academics and pop culture commentators, this day-long conference will unpack the many issues and implications in sex and the media, health, pop culture and politics.

Keynote speakers include esteemed author and research scientist Dr. Debby Herbenick, award-winning journalist Brian Alexander, and sex therapist, author and lecturer Dr. Marty Klein, all of whom bring their extensive professional experience and personal perspectives to bear on the themes of the day.  Four panels will delve deep into four features of sex in society.

I have no idea why the organizers feel they have to include politics and pop culture. Maybe they’re trying to get a more mainstream audience. Either way, I feel sometimes these events that try so hard to be mainstream, just need to see it for what it is. A sex conference. The best sex summit known to every man and woman.

On a related topic that focuses on me (naturally), I trotted off a while back to the Richmond Library (yes, I still support my library and you should also. Not my library, your own, unless you’re in Richmond which means you’re right and I’m wrong). I picked up Fifty Shades and was about to walk home when Muppet splat on the grass outside the library. So I thought I’d read for a few minutes until I could drag Muppet away from chewing the lawn.  Sixty minutes later I was still sat outside the library, totally engrossed with a completely bored Muppet begging to now go home.  I actually read and walked home. Yes, I was one of those people who doesn’t even look up at the traffic lights but hopes it’s some shade of green’ish grey in my favor. I then told all friends that I had double booked plans that weekend i.e. by telling everyone, I was off home free to sit in the garden and read the trilogy because everyone thought I was seeing everyone else so none of them pestered me. I’ve done this many a New Year’s eve also. Works wonders!

By the following Wednesday, I could only start a sentence with ‘oh my’ and I had men staring at me suspiciously as I walked past them on the street, trying to act like I had an air of sexual confidence that only comes from getting bed sores by reading a book 5 hours every night, whilst still working 14 hour days on her own business and confusing travel with getting-into-trouble.

So when it comes to October 27th, if you have $69 (very wink wink nudge nudge appropriate price), then get to the Sex Summit and don’t forget to bite your lip all day. You never know who’s watching, with a red room and hips that just won't quit!

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