4 No-No’s After a Breakup
A breakup is usually about as pleasant as a root canal, with a big dose of emotional turmoil thrown on top. Even if you know the relationship is kaput, the splitting process can bring out the worst in people. To help yourself, and prevent giving your ex ammo by seeing you hurt or vengeful, try focusing on the bright side. Yes, there is one!
Relationship expert Lisa Steadman, bestselling author of It’s a Breakup, Not a Breakdown, says everyone processes the end of a relationship differently, but if your goal is to accept it and move on, there are some actions to sidestep for a healthy recovery.
Steadman advises her clients to avoid these 4 common pitfalls when it comes to finding new happiness after a breakup:
1. Thinking more about your ex than yourself
When a woman is in the midst of a breakup, it tends to take center stage. All that energy is really a waste though, says Steadman, because it only heightens the negative emotions.
“It’s really easy to focus on what’s next for an ex – who will he date, what he will do – but a woman should really refocus on herself instead.”
The days of waiting until after dark to drive by your ex’s place to see if he was home, and who with, are long gone. Sure, the creepy drive-by option still exists but social media has made it easier than ever to check in on exes, and from anywhere. Though the temptation is strong, avoid following your ex online.
“The best approach is to just remove him from your social media pages,” said Steadman. “It will only upset you and make you feel like you’re missing out.”