Yes, we admit summer is the obvious sexy season . (Research actually backs that up.) Makes sense– you show more skin and may be out and about more with friends at parties, etc. so you have fun and simply feel better. We refuse to believe, though, that you can’t keep turning up the heat once the temperatures drop!
Sexual researcher Alex Allman is the author of the e-book Revolutionary Sex.“The biggest inhibitor that I see when it comes to happy sex lives is just the normal pressures and anxieties of life,” he says. We are more relaxed during the summer months, so we may be more open to sex. Once we all ‘fall’ back into our fall routines and feel a bit more pressure? “It doesn’t bode well for good sex tonight if tomorrow is stressful.” Allman has three tips for keeping the summer sizzle throughout the year:
1. LET THERE BE LIGHT
Lack of sunlight, more than a drop in temperature, can affect moods (including sexual ones) negatively. An estimated 4 to 6 percent of Americans suffer from Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), a form of depression linked to less sunlight. Another 10 to 20 percent struggle with less severe SAD symptoms. In both cases, the dip in energy and mood can cause the bottom to drop out of sexual desire. Allman recommends investing in a light therapy box designed especially to combat SAD.
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2. PEEL OFF THE EXTRA LAYERS
Cold weather simply requires more clothing. Pair that extra apparel with the fact that the indulgences of the holiday season can leave us feeling a little self-conscious about our bodies, and sex can easily be overlooked. You may not be able to get by in a skimpy outfit outdoors, but peel off the layers in the warmth of your home and show a little skin.
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3. SCHEDULE ROMANCE
Contrary to popular belief, sex is not something that just “happens” on its own — at least not all of the time. Healthy sex lives take commitment and effort.
“This idea we have that sex should always be spontaneous, or that if our desire has dipped we should just accept that, is flawed,” explains Allman. “We wouldn’t just wait for money to show up in our bank accounts or let it dwindle away without doing something about it. People need to view their sex lives in the same way.”
When you’re distracted by other things going on in your life, it’s easy to neglect sexual desire. That’s why scheduling time for intimacy is so important. “You don’t need to schedule time to have sex, per se, but carve out time to cuddle, to be together in a romantic way,” he suggests. “Open yourself up for the possibility of sex, rather than waiting for it.”
Whatever the reason you may feel a spike in sexual energy this summer, enjoy the heat. Just remember to carry those positive vibes into the fall and winter, too.
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