When I’m working with couples, I inevitably give them a homework assignment that causes their jaws to drop. “Your homework for the next week,” I’ll say, “is to have sex every single day for the next seven days. Are you willing to do that?”
The responses are widely varied, from enthusiastic to relieved to surly. But if they agree to do it and they complete the assignment, the results don’t vary. The couple always ends up feeling more loving and affectionate toward each other. They are more willing to compromise and to see their partner’s point of view. They are more likely to let small annoyances slide. This is the power of sex.
For most couples, they’ve just slipped out of the habit of having sex a few times a week. Before they know it, it’s been 2-3 weeks since the last time they made love. What they don’t realize is that it can be just as easy to slip back into the habit.
Seven consecutive days of sex will ramp up the potent cocktail of hormones in your system that will have you wanting even more. But plain vanilla won’t cut it when you’re trying to change the habit of sex. It helps to get a little creative, and, above all, remember to have fun.
Here are seven suggestions to make your week of daily sex the best homework assignment you’ve ever completed.
Day 1: Take it slow. You have to get to know each other anew. I recommend having a good, old-fashioned make out session to begin. Seriously, when was the last time you and your partner shared a passionate kiss? Mhmm, I thought so… it’s been ages. Let the kissing lead to touching, as if you’re exploring each other’s bodies for the first time.
Day 2: Explore variety. Try a position you’ve never tried before, or try a twist on a favorite position. For example, missionary position becomes less traditional when you put a pillow under your hips. Different positions are fun not only because variety is the spice of life, but some make it easier for your partner to stimulate your g-spot.
Day 3: Try an erotic massage. You can spring for a special massage oil, or just use coconut oil from your kitchen. Warm it up by placing the oil container in a bowl of hot water, then begin the massage. Use long, even strokes at first, and the try tantalizing your partner by alternating with a massage type touch. Let your fingers and your imagination go wild!
Day 4: Tie one on. Take your cue from the erotic novel, 50 Shades of Grey. You don’t need your own “red room of pain,” just a few neck ties. Have your partner use a tie to restrain each of your hands to the bedpost. No bedpost? No problem. Use one tie to tie your wrists together over your head. Use another tie as a blindfold. Without your sight, your other senses are heightened. Either of you can be tied up, decide who will play which role.
Day 5: Satisfy your hunger. Seattle Chef Tiberio Simone asserts that, “Seven days of hot sex must include full presence, full trust, and full honesty. Sensuality in sex is similar to sensuality in food. When food is made with love, there’s a sensual aspect to it. Eat well and make love.” Pour your love into cooking a delicious meal, and then have each other for dessert. Chef Tiberio recently authored a coffee table book La Figa: Visions of Food and Form. Beautifully photographed by Matt Freedman, the book is a delightful reminder of the sensuality of both food and the human form.
Day 6: Read together. Peruse something smutty, like a passage from the above-mentioned novel or another sexy read. You can also find loads of erotic writing online. It will get your juices flowing and perhaps give you some ideas. Don’t let those flowing juices go to waste; read a little then get busy.
Day 7: Try some new scenery. Have sex anywhere but in your bed. If you have children, I realize this can be tricky. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. Try the shower, or wait until they’re asleep and have your way with your partner on the living room couch. You might even throw in a sexy movie. Or, you can pretend you’re teenagers again and find a deserted place to go “parking”.
Remember– it’s supposed to be fun! Use these suggestions to enjoy connecting with your partner… and reap the rewards of a vibrant sex life.